Transforming Self-Perception: Unlocking Writer’s Happiness
Too many writers are too often unhappy with their level of writing success.
Today, I would like to address those who are making a living as writers, as well as those who are diligently striving to make a living as writers, and a commonality I have seen in both. I’d like to reach out to you, regardless of where you are or how much money you are making, you who feel unhappy or dissatisfied with the current level of your success or your career.
Measures of success are inaccurate moving targets. The issue at hand lies within the context in which we perceive ourselves and our self-determined criteria as we compare ourselves to others. This perception directly affects our emotions, our worldview, and how we perceive our own position within the industry. Both happiness and unhappiness are myths – which one do you choose to believe? Either one, we do it to ourselves. The problem does not originate from external factors or our lack of achievement. It also does not mean that we need to perform better. The real problem is that we fail to recognize what truly matters or the value we are already providing. We tend to criticize ourselves because we fall short of some arbitrary notion of success of our own determining. If we aspire to feel content with where we are as writers, we must alter our self-perception, leading to a transformative change in everything that follows.
During my son’s younger years, when he used to enjoy jumping off ladders onto his friends (like boys will do), our family became immersed in the melodramatic, soapish WWE wrestling. We eagerly followed the storylines, embraced the entertaining antics, and jammed to catchy songs such as “The Cult of Personality”. It was during this time that I realized something profound: our issue lies in a cult-like obsession with certain personalities, specifically an unrealistic ideal of what it means to be a successful person or writer by comparing ourselves to our chosen comparative cult. Instead, perhaps we should differentiate between our work and ourselves. Forget the cult. Forget the comparisons. The success (or lack thereof) of our work holds no bearing on our personal success as individuals, particularly as writers. Combining these two aspects can prove detrimental. Our perception of ourselves as writers should have no influence on the social or financial rewards attached to our writing. In fact, these two aspects should not even be part of the same discussion. Writing well and making money are two completely different things. One does not give value to the other. Stop comparing. Keep writing. Don’t worry; be happy.
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