Tell the Truth and Tell It Well
One of the most difficult parts of writing is telling the truth. When you sit down to write, you think of an idea, an occurrence, a story, a portrayal that happened, and something in your mind says, don’t write about that; you were told never to mention that; you are awful for saying that. You know that voice. When writing, though, we must tell that voice to be quiet. We need to find the courage to speak about important things, such as personal struggles, societal issues, or emotional experiences.
I’ve felt that way many times in my life, in writing and speaking engagements, feeling as though I were betraying something I shouldn’t be telling. I’ve had beautiful stories that I did not include because I did not have the courage, the presence, or the state of mind to include them. What would people think, I thought, if I wrote or told this? I lost an opportunity. Throughout my life, I lost several opportunities. All because of a lack of courage and a little voice that says, you shouldn’t share that.
As writers, though, we need to tell the truth. Telling those stories helps in multiple ways. By telling, we release things that are holding us back. Shame, if we want to go to that extreme, is probably the worst thing that can happen to human development. It holds us back. By throwing out what we shouldn’t mention, we release it. It no longer has a hold over us. It no longer keeps us down. Everyone knows now. We have nothing to hide. Also, someone reading or someone in the audience is probably waiting for someone just like us to step forward and have the courage to write or say the very thing that they themselves are hiding. We serve as their vent. We serve as permission for them to talk about it. When I started being freer with my stories, concentrating on the important points, not the way anything reflected on me or others that might have occupied my past, I had numerous people come up to me and say how much that story or the sharing of that experience meant to them in their life. They were freed because I was freed.
It's not only the truth, but it is telling it in a way that moves people. This is where our skills as writers come in. We know how to turn the phrase. We know how to build the story. We know how to hit the punchline. As writers, as we come up with these stories that must have so much power because they have been holding us back by sheer force, we find our zones when we have empowered ourselves with great techniques for sharing these things that help us and others. We learn to tell the truth in exciting ways. Doing this takes the focus and power off the experience or event itself. We become storytellers. We are no longer tattlers. We are sharing an experience that helps us and others. We build a community and bond between us because of the story, and we share something in a way that is memorable not only to us as we put things into perspective but also to those who listen when they need to be reminded of the story for help in their own lives.
It's bumpy when we start out sharing personal stories. Don’t worry about doing it well. We live in a society, a social media world where we are all wonderful, and life is a dream, but the reality is that sometimes it is a nightmare. Accept the bumpiness of sharing your personal stories, of writing them down, of fictionalizing them, if need be, or if that is what you write. Remember, as you go through this cathartic experience of writing, that no one will ever read what you write unless you want them to or until you are ready for them to. That’s what editing is all about: shaping the story to give it the most impact while maintaining its truthfulness. Always tell the truth and find the best way to do it. Your vulnerability will move others because they are vulnerable, too.
Everything that happens to you is part of your own life. You own your life, which means you own the stories: all the things you’ve done, all the things others have done around you that shaped you or done to you, the successes, the failures, the pains, the joys; they are all yours. Did you ever think that maybe, as writers, all these things happened to you for a reason? Look at the person across the room from you and maybe do both of you a favor by allowing something hidden to be released. Share your stories. Help yourself. Help others. I know that by doing so, I have been incredibly blessed. Tell the truth and tell it well.
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